Humans seem to think that cats will be satisfied with the simplest things. Little kibbles of artificially flavored cat food is what I usually get as a meal. A cockroach, once in a while. I’m never outside long enough to get a bird. I sometimes get scraps of human food, such as chicken or turkey. Humans just serve themselves the best food though. Well you know what?
I WANT ALL THE FOOD.
I deserve delicious food like cake, meatloaf, spaghetti, and cinnamon rolls. I am a cat, superior to humans. Why shouldn’t I have their food? I DEMAND that you make me high quality food. Or I will unleash awful things upon you.